Autumn's loss

Autumn at its end
The trees bow down and cry
Their skeletal branches
outlined against gray skies
Naked ...
all is black and white
No more color
No more love
Only the gray.

Drowning in self pity-


she counts down the minutes


Till the clock strikes three.





The bell rings


her mind and body tighten


in deep fear she stands at the door


Should she go or not?





She cannot decide


and welcomes God's will


It was not meant to be


She was never to see


this being whom she loved so much.





Love? Was it love? Was it obsession?


She could only block the thoughts


A movie, a painting anything


Please Lord give me anything


To make the pain end.





It is finished


She thought back to the Bible


She wants it to be finished


Finish-


the pain


the loss


the hurt



Please do not leave me!!!


As a young creature


Running through the fields


she would scream


Please do not leave me!!!





No voice would answer


not even of that being


She thought she loved





Now, the clock strikes three


and yes it is finished


She will go there no longer


She will remember no longer


Born to live and die alone


Yet in you Lord...she is not alone


I am not alone!


The Lord is her strength


her power


her happiness


her unending rainbow.





Unquinched is her heart


a heart begging for a hug


a heart begging...


not to be pushed away


Yet, today you did


you did! you did!


you pushed me away



Never am I to hear


the clicking of your heels


upon school's hard floor


never am I to call you...


sister.